Inconsistency is the number one reason that we fail at change. Before we get into a routine, we give up, question the process, doubt the method – and we allow ourselves to give up before we even have a fighting chance.
Over the last couple of years, being more consistent has been one of the hardest things to do, but one of the most beneficial. I’m going to share with you some of the ways that I changed my mindset and thought process behind change, consistency and success.
Focus on one goal at a time
One of my biggest downfalls used to be this: get super motivated — think of 10 things I’m going to start doing better — implement on Monday — fail with half by Wednesday — give up on all by Friday — repeat. Once I started focusing on one big goal at time, it allowed me to keep myself feeling less overwhelmed when the time to act on it came.
I know there are a lot of areas in your life you might want to change or be better about – your health, your weight, being organized, a skin routine, your relationships, your parenting…but it’s impossible to take these all on at the same time. Break it down, prioritize – what is the first, most important goal that you want to focus on? Start there. Make it super specific and detailed, make it multifaceted – for example, if your goal is weight loss, it should just be “lose 20 pounds”. Why do you want to lose 20 pounds? Do you want to have more energy? Do you want to feel more confident? Do you want to sleep better? Think about everything so that you’re not only focusing on something like the number on the scale, because that can become discouraging even if you’re doing all the right things.
Choose a goal, think it all the way through, decide on your approach and implement it for a minimum of 4 weeks before you decide if it needs adjustment.
Work on your mindset every single day
The number one reason we are inconsistent is because we allow ourselves to talk ourselves out of everything. If we wake up and don’t feel it that day, we let our minds run instead of taking action and, before we know it, we’ve justified why we can take the day off. This slippery slope is step one to quitting. You might be able to pull it off for a day or two, but one it happens it’s going to keep happening, enough for you to not see progress, enough for you to start getting frustrated, enough for you to give up on yourself again.
Act before you have time to think yourself out of it. If you haven’t read The Five Second Rule by Mel Robbins yet, and this is something you struggle with – grab a copy or listen on Audible STAT.
Personal development books and podcasts have really helped me to not only identify the areas that I struggle with, but also ways to cope with them so that they don’t continue to derail you. Incorporate this mindset work in daily and it will absolutely keep you motivated to stay consistent.
Don’t base your goals on upcoming events
Something super easy to give up on: what you’re going weigh at so-and-so’s wedding.
Something less easy to give up on: small day to day habits to create a new lifestyle.
I used to always start new diets based on a wedding, or a trip – it was always giving me a timeline and I would think “ok, this is going to be really motivating, I’m not going to give up this time”. That lasted for approximately 1 week, mayyyyyyybe 2.
What I want you to start to imagine is this – if you had spent all this time you’ve been inconsistent and yo-yoing focusing on actually changing your lifestyle and your day to day activities, you’d be perfectly capable of receiving that wedding invite and simply being excited for the event, instead of going into panic mode.
Seems like a crazy thought, right? But it’s possible – you just have to change your perspective on this whole thing. Do the daily activities that it takes to get to your goal, because you want to be at your goal, not because you have something coming up where you want to “be” this different person.
You’re still you. You’ll always be you. But you have the opportunity to change the things you do on a daily basis to reach different goals. It’s going to take some serious honesty, looking at your current habits and activities and not only deciding what doesn’t fit, but being willing to let them go if they’re not conducive to this change.
Celebrate along the way
We’ve got one life. One opportunity to be the person you want to be, who does the things you want to do, who sees the things you want to see, who wears the things you want to wear, who feels the way you want to feel.
This is not about deciding on a behavior you want to change, implementing that change for 3 months and then reverting back to your old ways. It’s about actually changing the behavior forever. So if your goal is to implement a new skincare routine (using this as an example b/c I totally need to do it), take photos of your skin at the start and along the way. Write down the reasons you want to do this from the beginning and then pay attention as you go. How does your skin feel, how does it look, what are you hoping to improve. If you notice changes, even subtle ones, even ones that involve your mindset around it (“hey, I’ve done this routine for a week straight, I’m proud of myself”, “I’ve only been doing this for a week and I can already see that my skin feels less rough”, etc.). Notice the small stuff. Be self-aware, and allow yourself to be proud of the progress instead of getting impatient with the time it’s taking to reach the end result.
Let me know what your next goal is, I want to hear how these tips work for you!